sonja_ninja

and skipping class today so i can actually try and get some sleep. i need to go up to school anyway and spend time in the library doing research but i'd hate to drive the 25 miles for nothing really... there's so much i need to do here like laundry and clean my room and go down and pay rent.  allen texted me yesterday trying to tell me he wants to be friends because i'm "such an awesome girl" who "deserves better" and all that jazz. i don't know what acid he's tripping balls on right now that makes him think i'm ready to forgive him for what he did. so i went ahead and told him he's being used and he pretty much said he thought he might be too. so why effing stay with her? really? i'm starting to move on to someone else and that situation is even worse but i really hope it works out...

EX DRAMA: apparently allen has been on dates now with a girl at work he used to talk shit about and say everyone thought she was annoying... normally i feel mad when boys downgrade after dating me but this is just funny... she's really not cute and she's kind of pudgy. haha.

SCHOOL: once again there are 9 people in my polisci class and 5 of them are from my last one lol. including cute boy who sits in the front ;]

WORKOUT: did another 2 miles today... thanks to being angry. i'm hungry... i've had a piece of toast and some famous amos cookies today. that's it. i know i shouldn't eat this late but i probably won't have time tomorrow before work soooo.... met some cool people at the hot tub after that :]

it's the last saturday night before school starts up and instead of partying i went and burned 200 calories by brisk walking 3 miles on the treadmill and then got into the hot tub after. and i've eaten healthy all day. drank water and green tea. had organic eggs and milk with toast for breakfast. eating tuna fish with olive oil mayo on crackers now. still feeling a little beat up over boys though :/ ready for that to end. i'm just gunna have to do work/school/work out all the time to take my mind off of it! 

last night was crazy... ran into my general manager at the bar. normally they're supposed to leave whenever they see us because hanging out with us outside of work could cause them to take "favourites". but he stayed and so did i. it was actually interesting to get to talk to him outside of work as a real person and not my boss.

dj tiesto is coming to okc in october woo! VIP tickets are only like $40 so i think that's what i'm getting if i have extra money after paying rent. i'm so excited :D

I need to stay away from ex's.
they're ex's for a reason.
i don't know why i keep jumping back in thinking things will change.
i'm too weak for this :(

today is my little sister's first day of 5th grade...
which means its her last year in elementary school.
she has a lot of fashion sense to learn before she goes to middle school.

it's my day off and it's sunny so i SHOULD be at the pool.
but i just can't bring myself to get out of my bad mood and go.
i still need to do a lot of unpacking too.
ugh lazylazylazy.

today was pretty awful as far as a day can go.

i was supposed to go pay for another month of that stupid thing that's on my car for the DUI and i couldn't because i didn't have the money. i had to re-schedule for friday which is pay day. and as if that wasn't bad enough... i tried calling my credit card company because i can't make the $119 a month payment... i explained to them that i'm a college kid and i also pay for rent and other shit and they just kept explaining why it was so high and then informed me that this month's payment is $230 because i was not only late on last month's payment but couldn't make all of it... well how the fuck are you going to get money from me when i just told you i don't have it? awesome. 23 years old and already in debt.

i've been all work like all the time.
and will be for the next week because all the sorostitutes have rush..
eye roll.

the dumbass ex is back and town.
and finally talking to me again.
i don't even know whats going on anymore.
i wish i could not like him...
but i'm still not over him when i should be.

school starts in two weeks or so and i can't wait.
i'm sick of only going to work.
i need something else before i go insane!
plus it's a good excuse to pick up shifts if i don't want to ;]

i should probably hang up all my clothes now.
they're still sitting in the living room after being moved in for 9 days.
oops!

so i am in LOVE with my new apartment.
the last one was furnished... but with drabby blue-grey things.
this one has a wooden desk and drawer set.
plus my mini fridge and walk in closet are a plus as well ;]
lisa and i bought vodka, wine, and beer to celebrate haha.
i'm so happy to be here :]
and just happy over all for once!

i feel like i liberated myself...
for i no longer give a shit about any boy right now!
if a boy can't handle the go get em 'bitch' am i...
then he doesn't deserve for me to be on his arm!
i'll wait forever if i have to :]
being single is more fun anyway.

my macbook widget says its supposed to rain the next three days.
i really hope not... one day of rain is nice but 3? bleh.
i've cracked the window open to listen to it though.

i burned myself on the tail pipe of a motorcycle on my bday.
it's all gross looking and now it's itchy.
i guess that means its healing? i hope so.
i really hope it doesn't leave an ugly scare.
i'll be so upset :(

i miss the stupid ex again :/
i really wish i didn't.
i hope by the time he gets back in the state i'll be strong enough to not care anymore.
note to self: block off all feelings to the world except to hockey.